The happy medium

During uni I always held down 2 or 3 jobs as well as a full-time uni load. I would get good marks, write for the uni paper, go out lots, stay in sometimes, work here and there and over there too... and still juggle all the balls and do it well.

So to get to this age now where I've got one full time job, teach yoga just a couple of times a week, and to find that I can't even excel in these fields or a personal life... it's a struggle. I don't want to just be coasting along - I really want to achieve lots along the way.

But I had a dr appt last week for a few reasons and she bought this up, and said that sometimes it's good to focus on just coasting along... Just coping with coasting along. She told me to take it step by step, and really - step back, be where I am, and worry about other things later.

I find it so frustrating to be tired all the time (some people suffer insomnia with D - me, I'm the complete opposite and could sleep for 23 out of 24 hrs). I find it annoying that I have limited concentration and jump from task to task without really finishing them as well as I could. I mean, I'm doing fine - my work is getting done to a very well standard - it's just not the standard that I know I'm capable of. But I suppose today, right now, it actually is what I'm capable of.

Does this all make sense?

But how good of my doc to point out to ME what I point out to my yoga students all the time - be here, now, fully. Don't worry about the future or what has happened in the past. Just focus on today.

It's too true : )